The Weekend of Drama....

Why is it that when you kick it with some people, there is always DRAMA? Saturday night, I went out with 2 of my friends. R just broke up with her man J and I was also with my friend K. R was out for a night of fun, however she spent the entire night with him calling like 250,000 times. So she ended up downing bottle of wine and going to meet up with him. *Note* - They are broken up but trying to work shit out. Never mind that after the breakup she was in the hospital of suicide watch for downing a whole bottle of pills and then he went and got a restraining order against her...Hmmmm...I'll leave that one alone. **MOVING ON** So we all get our drink on at K's house, R left and so K and I went downtown to The City. As we get to the club, the bouncer let us in with no cover....Damn right, I was looking hotter than some fondue chocolate in my BCBG stilletto's and low cut blouse!

So we proceed to hit the bar and go get our drink ONNNN and get our clown on with all the triflin nigga's that come to the club and the white girls that can't dance and the drunk bitches acting stupid. I was straight entertaining myself UNTILLLLL the absolute ugliest nigga up in the club decides to come holla at me. WHY ME????!!! Do I exude some sort of vibe that the most broke down, ugly, gold toof nigga must come talk to me????? So as he approaches me, I feel like straight up Florida Evans~"Damn, Damn, Damn"!!!!! And so he gets RIGHT in my face breath just STANKIN up a storm and says "Damn baby, I been watchin your fine ass all night....so can I get a little conversation?" "Ummm sure, hey have you heard of this weird invention called chewing gum, or perhaps, mints, Altoids, sumthin???" So then my girl K and my other friend Iv that came to the club later were like let's go get on the dance floor....he follows...fabulous! To make this long excruciating story short, he licked my face, LICKED MY FACE!!!!! and then says in my ear "I can lick like that elsewhere too".....Ummm I think I just threw up in my mouth a little bit.

Meanwhile K's "man" G shows up....now let me preface by saying I CANNOT STAND THIS NEGRO! He is 22 years old, MARRIED and has 5, yeah I said it right, FIVE CHILDREN!!! Four of them are with his wife and the other child was born through one of his 162,000 affairs he has obviously had. And through all this drama, he claims he's a man of God and that is in "training to me a minister" Ummm yeah. On top of that, he has NO job and is missing 5 teeth....Lawwd help this dude! I had a feeling he was going to show up because she kept text-messaging someone all night. So he shows up, looking like a broke down Usher. He and K start dancing (AFTER he went and grinded all up on some other chick) and then we left. As we are leaving K makes mention of Ugly dude who licked my face (who I finally managed to get rid of) and she was like "damn he would not leave you alone girl", so I say "no kidding" and he says "You liked it, I could tell" So I respond with "Ummm no nigga, unlike yourself I have never cheated on my husband and actually take my marriage vows seriously" Amazingly enough he gave me a dirty ass look. Sooooo we get to K's car. She is VERY drunk so she gives him the keys and asks if he is sober, he says "Yes" and gets in the car and proceeds to speed out the parking lot at like 80 MPH....He then starts flying through downtown Portland at top speeds at like 60 MPH going the WRONG FUCKING WAY. At this point, I'm thinking, okay this nigga is straight drunk. So I ask him, where the fuck are you going? I get an "Oh my bad" back. He finally gets on the right freeway and then almost hits the concrete divider at 80 trying to change lanes before the freeway split going between heading to Salem or Seattle. At that point, my ass LOST it. I cussed that motha-fucker out. I told his ass to pull over and I drove. Madder than a mutha fucka! So on my home K calls my cell and I'm like "don't ever bring him in my presence again-seriously" Fuck that!